So, as many of you know, I watch a lot of televised baseball and football. That means I see a lot of commercials targeted at predominantly male audiences, including a fair number of commercials for erectile dysfunction medications. I’ve noted that the narrator always says to contact your doctor if you “experience a sudden loss of hearing or vision.”

That would seem like good advice regardless of whether you’re taking Cialis or any other medication (for ED or anything else).
However, I have to wonder if one would know if that sudden loss of hearing or vision was due to the medication or just a consequence of what always happens to men when they have an…uh…well, you get the picture.
Men aren’t known for their exceptional hearing or vision when the lieutenant is steering the ship, if you know what I mean. So, a sudden loss of faculties might just seem like par for the course to some men.

Of course, this line of thinking has reminded me of one of my all-time favorite Facebook posts about how the little ones in our midst don’t always hear things exactly as we think they do. I can’t decide what would be more difficult as a parent: explaining ED to one of my kids, or hiding my amusement if one of my kids thought that the advertisement was for a medication targeted at dinosaurs. I am in touch with my sense of humor, so it’s quite possible I’d find myself rolling around on the ground laughing.

This also reminds of a time when my five-year-old son, Eric, and I are having a guys’ night while Charlotte was out with her friends. We had MLB Network on and were watching a preseason baseball game. I stepped out of the living room for a moment to tend to dinner. When I came back, we had the following exceptionally uncomfortable conversation:

Eric: “Papa, you need Viagra.”

Me: [stammering] “Buddy, why do you think Papa needs Viagra?”

Eric: “Because it would help your problems,” he said.

Me: [simultaneously registering bemusement and blind panic] “Which problems are you talking about?”

Eric: “The ones with your back and neck. You need Viagra to fix you right up. But talk to your doctor first.”

It turns out that while I was in the kitchen, he saw a commercial for Viagra. I am not sure what part of the commercial made him think that Viagra was the ticket, but Charlotte thinks it’s because those commercials always depict manly men doing manly things.

That means the double entendre of the manly man throwing a football through a swinging tire while his hot wife smiles approvingly is lost on him. He sees that the Viagra made it possible for the man to throw the football, but he appears to have missed the idea that later, this manly man will be “throwing” his “football” through his lady friend’s “swinging tire” with gusto thanks to the Viagra.